Warning, this post contains accidental adult language
We are in the car driving to school
CAELAN: Mommy, did you see that school bus?!
SARAH: No, I didn’t, honey.
CAELAN: Mommy, you need to watch for school buses when you’re driving!
CAELAN: Mommy, when I grow up, I’m going to be a Daddy like Daddy. And Leah is going to be a Mommy! Does that sound like a good idea?
SARAH: That sounds like a great idea, monkey!
CAELAN [singing]: Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, is your butt a dream.
Caelan does a somersault.
SARAH: What was that you just did?
CAELAN: A flipper-kit.
SARAH: What number is on our door?
SARAH: Try again.
CAELAN: What was that monster we saw again?
SARAH: That was a Grim Reaper.
CAELAN: Grim Reaper. I’m gonna tell Daddy I saw a Grim Reaper.
A few minutes pass…
CAELAN: Mommy, what was the monster called again?
SARAH: Grim Reaper.
CAELAN: [pauses…..] I’m just going to call it a “monster”.
I hear Leah crying.
SARAH: Caelan, what did you do to your sister?
CAELAN: Nothing. I attacked her and she attacked me.
BILL: What’s the dinosaur’s name?
CAELAN: Fuck a duck.
We are driving to Grandma and Pop’s house.
CAELAN: This is the way to Grandma and Pop’s house. It’s also the way to Grammy and Pappy’s house. Ooh firestation!!
BILL [laughing at Caelan’s abrupt change of attention]: Squirrel!
CAELAN: Did you see a squirrel Daddy? Where’s the squirrel??